RAMBLE #12: DEPRESSION - WHY PEOPLE MUST NOT TAKE IT AS A JOKE

R.I.P. Anthony Bourdain.

Real talk coming up my dude.

I wasn't a hard-core fan Mr. Bourdain; I watched his shows occasionally on the Internet but I'm still sad to learn that another significant person in the lives of many is gone. I really fancy the premise of his shows which is to travel the world and bathe in their culture and try their food.


What is much more unfortunate to know is that the alleged reason for his demise his suicide most likely due to depression.

It's funny how successful and rich people still get depressed and commit suicide; what more for ordinary folk like me and you. Apparently this shows that money, power and fame does not exempt someone from depression.

It's also sad that a lot of people take this mental health condition as a joke. I've spoken to a lot of people and they just think it's something you can just turn off or just think happy thoughts and it will all go away. I should know.

I haven't been diagnosed with clinical depression, but I've fought bouts of it for three years. It's that feeling of uselessness and hopelessness that you don't really want to wake up the next day and experience it all over again. It is totally uncontrollable and no matter how much you drown yourself in leisure, you'll eventually stop and start feeling that emptiness again.

Most people would recommend to talk to someone about it but this isn't always the solution. The person you'll be speaking with should have maturity and open-mindedness to understand the situation. I am basically speaking through experience. I talked to my mom, dad and wife about it but all they gave me was a shrug and said, "Get over it." Personally I wish it was that easy. There were times I went on leave from work to 'get over it' but even during my time at the pool or facing nature, there is always that little voice in my head telling me that, "C'mon man. When this is all over? You'll go back to your job and home and meet the same people who pretend they understand you. NOTHING WILL CHANGE."

..Meet 

the same people 

who pretend 

they understand you. 

Nothing will change.

People have different ways of overcoming depression. Mine was when I joined a religious community. I haven't felt the same symptoms of depression for a couple of months now. It didn't happen instantaneously though; it started when I was given a particular role which gave me a sense of purpose. My leaders were also very patient with my mistake and even encouraged me to try again and learn from my mistake. It was a breath of fresh air from the usual negativity I experienced from my dad and wife. I wasn't immediately judged and I was always given a chance to defend myself which made me a lot more determined to work hard.

Now, going this route may or may not work for you. But if you're going through it now, there is a light at the end of the tunnel no matter how cliche that may sound. What kept me from killing myself was that I always reminded myself of the stuff that I still wanted to do: buy a house, get my own car, have kids, travel, eat at a buffet whenever I wanted without having to look in my wallet, etc. In a small way, it gave me that little nudge to push forward.

I know what you're going through my dude. I may not be an expert at it, but I can sure as hell talk to you about it. No judgement here; from one stranger on the Internet to another.